HOW TO Install A Southern Home Security System:
2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo magazine.
3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:
Me and Marcel, Donnie Ray and Jimmy Earl went for more ammo and beer.
Be back in a bit. Don’t mess with the pit bulls. They got the mailman this morning
and messed him up really bad. I don’t think Killer took part but it was hard to tell
from all the blood and everything. Anyway, I locked all four of ‘em in the house. Better wait outside. Be right back.